• Pending appraisals
    • Coat hanger reviews
    • Tacky Raccoons
    • Pwn Greenland
    • Crumbs of life


    • WBC Bulletin board:

    Mon
    5
    Jul
    2010

    Out of the mouth of Dave

    Weblog URL: http://www.outofthemouthofdave.com/

    Reason for application:

    I have a humor blog whose message needs to be spread to the vast seas of unwashed masses - I figured a good option for that started with being included in your exclusive club

    Thanks

    Dave

    Dave has very quickly learned that flattery goes a long way toward WBC membership. Although imitation may be considered the highest form of flattery in many circles, we’ve discovered that generosity is well received in these troubled times. Whether that may be in terms of spirit or financial contribution will obviously be his personal decision.

    ‘Out of the mouth of Dave’ brings us his irreverent view of media events and the world at large. This fledgling comedian is starting to find his stride and even managed to provoke a smattering of titters from beneath my classicly waxed moustache. However, I’m not sure I could ever share a sauna with a Canadian man who cites the Godfather and Chicken Run in his favourite films of all time and as we all know - that is the true measure of a mans mettle.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    It seems that Herr Dave ist taking a break from his blog to take care of his scruffy neck.  Und he ist Canadian. Für this reason alone I am reluctant to approve his application.  However, the Colonel has persuaded me with a bag of lebkuchen to overlook this shortcoming und so I will grant approval.

    Frau von Sauertraut, Cultural Direktor

    Please visit this site and return to give your rating here...
    Rating: 4.0/10 (2 votes cast)
    Filed in appraisals, permitted | Public rantings (2)
    Thu
    8
    Apr
    2010

    New premises

    Due to the rather painfully,invasive inspection by Mr Ernest Gripe the WBC has undergone a severe down-sizing operation. Exacerbated by the economic downturn and a near terminal attack of malaise our offices have been temporarily relocated to a small, yet homely structure located within the grounds of Blogworthy Manor.

    To the untrained eye this may look like a garden shed but rest assured what dwells within is a close facsimile of a working environment. Besides, all lawn-tending equipment has been moved to the greenhouse.

    With a view to reviewing the situation regarding reviewing the horrendous backlog of blog reviews we have re-viewed our previous reviews. In this regard, our view is that re-reviewing reviews is not worth regarding. Regardless, the decision to re-view review reviews has been re-viewed and will no doubt be regarded with suitable disregard.

    Fondest regards,

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Filed in WBC news, office memo | Tagged , , , , | Public rantings (7)
    Sat
    3
    Oct
    2009

    Notification of intent

    This is official notification of the intent to notify our intentions. At this juncture our intent is unclear but we do intend to clarify this as soon as we receive clear instruction of clarification to notify from the department of notification clarification.

    If you have any questions then please speak very loudly as there is nobody present in the office and the nearest member of staff lives three streets away. Thankyou.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Filed in WBC news, office memo | Public rantings (5)
    Sun
    1
    Feb
    2009

    Office closure

    This is an official notification of a temporary closure in WBC proceedings from monday 2nd february 2009.

    This is due to the discovery by Mr Ernest Gripe of a seedy underbelly within these hallowed walls. Corruption, bribery and nepotism were words that came to light - so nothing unexpected at this juncture.

    Of course as soon as he removes his sticky paws from our bottom drawers all will return to normal.

    My apologies for those weblogs awaiting appraisal.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Filed in office memo | Public rantings (3)
    Tue
    27
    Jan
    2009

    Ernest Gripe

    It is my duty to inform all members of the World Blog Council that we will be undergoing a strenuous evaluation period over the coming weeks so all sensitive paperwork should be shredded immediately.

    The mediator sent from Whitehall will be none other than the Honorable Ernest Gripe, a teetering force within the blogging community who will be casting his somewhat beady eye over proceedings.

    Please cooperate fully with Mr Gripe and under no circumstances call him a cantankerous old fossil-  as this tends to exacerbate his facial tick and oily skin issue.

    Welcome to the WBC Mr Gripe - we have nothing to hide. Probably.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Filed in office memo, staff info | Public rantings (2)
    Mon
    26
    Jan
    2009

    How Joe sees it

    Weblog URL: http://www.howjoeseesit.com/

    Reason for application:

    I blog, therefore I am. Please acknowledge my existence on the World Wide Web so I know I blog for some higher purpose.

    Joe sees life through the eyes of a dieting, tattooed tech-junkie whose musical and political leanings colour his blogging output. All in all things seem very satisfactory.

    I had a tattoo once during a three day shore leave in Saigon - apparently I was slightly intoxicated and so was the artist. The results, however, are somewhat of a mystery to me as I haven’t seen that part of my body for nearly twenty years. Approval granted.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    .

    Herr Herrara ist a faithful blogger. His vast knowledge of nutrition und fitness ist sehr interesting, especially when he uses words like lacto-ovo vegan. He also writes political und social commentary posts, a subject matter usually frowned upon by the WBC under Section 19(1.b). However, his mission to entertain und amuse his readers offsets this infraction und so he may continue.

    Es ist not difficult to acknowledge Joe’s existence but whether he blogs for some higher purpose ist still unknown. Approval ist granted.

    Frau von Sauertraut, Cultural Direktor

    Please visit this site and return to give your rating here...
    Rating: 8.2/10 (5 votes cast)
    Filed in appraisals, approvals, instructional, observational | Tagged , , , | Leave your opinion here (0)
    Thu
    22
    Jan
    2009

    Bribery and corruption

    It has come to my attention that there is underhand nonsense in progress on the internet based world wide web. A certain young lady, currently undergoing a lifetime ban from the WBC (for crimes against the Blogiverse) has been utilising her information technology skills to confuse and further derange staff members.

    She has nominated the WBC (in several categories) for the Bloggers choice awards. This is a shameless attempt at bribery and will not be taken bending over.

    Under no circumstances are any members or visitors to the WBC to succumb to her dastardly plot and therefore we must all rally round and vote like the wind. Confuse the enemy and smoke her out.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    My site was nominated for Best Humor Blog! My site was nominated for Most Obnoxious Blogger! My site was nominated for Best Blog About Blogging! My site was nominated for Best Blog Design!

    Filed in office memo | Tagged , , | Public rantings (2)
    Wed
    21
    Jan
    2009

    Daddy Papersurfer

    daddypapersurfer

    Weblog URL: http://www.daddypapersurfer.com/

    Reasons for application:

    I received an email from a young lady with buns attached to her ears who demanded that I re-apply after my recent justified ban.

    I comply.

    I am on the verge and need a push. I believe the WBC are the people for the job.

    Yours sincerely folks

    D. Papersurfer

    For some reason the Colonel will have nothing to do with Daddy Papersurfer and consequently he must remain in limbo so far as certification is concerned.

    I assure you Mr Papersurfer, that it isn’t anything personal and I will use every skill I possess to get the Colonel onto it and, if that fails, I’ll get Frau Sauertraut to twist his arm.

    Ms A. Tutt PA

    .

    Due to a severe limb twisting episode in the supply cupboard this morning I feel I am unable to pass reasonable judgement over this most delicate of issues. His weblog seems to be a cascade of ridiculosity and idiotic verbal bunglings so in many respects he might even be suitable for employment.

    With great hesitancy (and awaiting a second opinion from Frau Sauertraut) I grant approval.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    .

    This Vater of Papersurfer has triggered very much debate in the offices during the past few weeks. His omnipresence ist alarming und his actions will continue to be monitored very closely. However, in spite of the Herr’s insolence and flatulence, his weblog does comply to the regulations as set out in the WBC Charter Addendum issued last month. Und so I have no choice but to give him my rubber stamp.

    Approval ist granted.

    Frau von Sauertraut, Cultural Direktor

    Please visit this site and return to give your rating here...
    Rating: 8.4/10 (20 votes cast)
    Filed in appraisals, excellent, observational, titilating | Tagged , , , , | Public rantings (14)
    Tue
    20
    Jan
    2009

    Inauguration day

    It brings a tear to my eye and a lump to my throat to announce that during a very solemn and important ceremony this afternoon Mr T. Ern will be handed the keys to the downstairs broom cupboard. The implications of this are awe inspiring and somewhat humbling.
    Mr Ern was born in a skip in South East London with nothing but congealed paint and an old foam mattress for food. He was rescued by a slightly inebriated prostitute and later brought up and educated by a small team of Polish cleaning ladies.
    These brave and beautiful people have inspired and shaped young Ern into the formidable tea brewing empressario that he is today. Coupled with these natural gifts and a genuinely enduring personality he finally has control of his own Vileda supermop.

    Congratulations Mr T. Ern

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Filed in office memo, staff info | Tagged | Public opinion (1)
    Mon
    19
    Jan
    2009

    Fracas

    Weblog URL: http://fracas.wordpress.com/

    Reason for application:

    Due to a recent report of someone being caught with their pants down here, I find I have no choice but apply for approval in order to more closely monitor the situation.

    This is all for the good of interweave patrons the world over, of course…

    (I may or may not report my findings, all based on whether or not there are chocolates and/or wine offered while I await the approval.)

    Sincerely,

    Fracas
    Executive Secretary to the Oblogsman himself.

    Young Ms Fracas brings us her view of the world from the depths of Canada’s Saskatchewan Province. She seems to think that displaying ample cleavages and writing titillating features will bring vistors to her internet empire. She may well be correct in this assumption - it seems like just yesterday that I was traversing the dangerous waters of the Gulf of Thailand just to get a warm shot of Sangthip and a glimpse of a ping pong ball in mid-air.

    Her weblog thrusts varied and well presented information into our range of vision. Approval granted.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    .

    This Frau Fracas ist one more Canadian who pushes the envelopes of acceptable behaviour on the Internet. The many references to boobs ist concerning but can be forgiven since her charming stories of life in sub-zero temperatures are quite amusing. She ist very knowledgable about popular culture, a sign that television ist very important in that deep freeze province that I cannot pronounce.

    Approval ist granted, but this Fracas remains on the WBC list of possible offenders of Section 14.5.6 Paragraph 9(2). Und her close association mit Vater Papersurfer remains an ongoing concern.

    Frau von Sauertraut, Cultural Direktor

    Please visit this site and return to give your rating here...
    Rating: 7.0/10 (8 votes cast)
    Filed in appraisals, approvals, observational | Tagged , | Public rantings (5)
    Fri
    16
    Jan
    2009

    World Blog Council chatter box

    With great pleasure I would like to draw your attention to the ‘WBC chatter box’ at the top right hand corner of this page. This method of communication may be known to you as a ’shoutbox’, ‘twitterbox’ or simply a ‘wall’.

    If you click on ‘Leave a reply’ and type a message you may join in with the days jollity.

    It is of course moderated to avoid purile spatterings of infantile crudity from pervading our fine establishment. So be patient if you are a first time visitor to our commenting system. Once passed, however, you will have free reign to bombard us with irritating nonsense.

    Thank you for your inebriosity.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Filed in office memo | Tagged , , | Public rantings (3)
    Thu
    15
    Jan
    2009

    I’ll never forget the day I read a book

    Weblog URL: http://residentreader.blogspot.com/

    Reason for application:

    Please accept my application for approval. I really did read a book once and may do so again some day. In the meantime I am looking at the pictures in some books and watching the movie in other cases and writing short essays about what I have learned on my blog.

    I m providing this service in order to spread literacy among the unenlightened denizens of cyber-land. I encourage everyone to try reading a book, at least once.

    I’ll never forget the day I read a blog with such a long title. It was… now where was I? Bugger! Where did I put my glasses? Right. Blogs. Reviews. Is the Coach and Horses open yet?

    Mr Bjorke is a prolific digester of literature and has dedicated his time and effort to review these works for our perusal before diving in ourselves. An admirable notion, well executed. Did I mention his moustache? I believe I did. Approval granted.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Anyone with the time and energy to review books so well after the amount of time he must spend in trying to make me a pogonophilist of sorts must be commended. The Colonel of course started me on my love for facial hair. I very often go quite weak at the knees at the thought of a whisker.

    I’m with the Colonel all the way on this one.

    Ms Ashley Tutt PA

    Please visit this site and return to give your rating here...
    Rating: 7.3/10 (7 votes cast)
    Filed in appraisals, approvals, instructional | Tagged , , | Public opinion (1)
    Wed
    14
    Jan
    2009

    Criminal element

    An increasing level of criminal intent has been creeping into the hallways of this hallowed edifice. Last Thursday two of my chocolate Hobnobs (a delicious and nutritious oaty snack to accompany my afternoon Earl Grey moment) were pilfered from Ms Tutts ‘kitchenette’. The perpitrator was of course instantly apprehended and handed over to the authorities (he was last seen being hauled off in a necklock from the good Frau).

    Although one may take the view that the theft of a small round chocolate covered oat-filled biscuit designated for post lunch delictatory purposes may be the merest of misdemeanours but I believe this sort of behaviour is the start of a crack that will weaken the very fabric of our great and noble organisation. So in future keep your grubby paws away from my biccies.

    Thankyou for your elongation.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Filed in office memo | Tagged , , | Public rantings (4)
    Mon
    12
    Jan
    2009

    Clark’s Picks

    Weblog URL: http://clarkspicks.com/

    Reason for application:

    Clark’s Picks will be one year old on December 31st, 2008, ancient by the standards of the world wide tube system. I have endeavored to find and present the most significant moments in recent (since the invention of “talking pictures”) musical history on Clark’s Picks for the edification of children, hip hop fans and bored office workers.

    Some religious fanatics have recently discovered and changed my password and have been posting about something called “Zappadan” on Clark’s Picks, however in cooperation with the Department of Homeland Security, I am having them evicted soon. I hope this will not adversely effect my application for approval by the World Blog Council.

    Young Clarke has a passion for all things musical, especially music history from the United States of America in the early Twentieth Century. It features video clips and informative snippits relating to each featured artist. Of course if you have no musical bent this will be about as interesting to you as a tax accountant’s cocktail party in the ‘lounge’ of his semi-detached house in the suburbs of Birmingham (with vol-au-vents).

    It is, however, well presented and tidy much like the author’s moustache. Approval granted.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    .

    This blog brings back so many musical memories und now I can’t stop singing, despite Ms. Tutt’s annoying attempts to make me stop. Es ist Herr Clarke’s love of guitar musik that keeps him blogging und with sixteen years as a radio show host he is able to find clips that keep my feet tapping und the Professor’s head spinning. I will be listening to Billie Holiday, Django Reinhardt und Louis Armstrong until the cows arrive to take Ms. Tutt home.

    Approval ist granted.

    Frau von Sauertraut, Cultural Direktor

    Please visit this site and return to give your rating here...
    Rating: 7.9/10 (10 votes cast)
    Filed in appraisals, instructional, splendid | Tagged , , | Public rantings (7)
    Thu
    8
    Jan
    2009

    Frosty reception

    An unsurprising lack of maintenance following a burst water pipe in the reception area, coupled with the somewhat strange disappearance of the front door has led to the creation of a temporary ice sheet. Skates will be issued to all staff members for reaching all ground floor offices.

    The ‘no children’ sign posted at the entrance must be heeded at all times. Their incessant screaming and giggling is quite unnecessary and will almost certainly lead to prosecution for truancy and delinquent behaviour.

    Thankyou for your perspicacity.

    Colonel Reginald Fotherington-Blogworthy II CEO, MD, ARSE

    Filed in office memo | Tagged , , | Public rantings (3)