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Applications to be filed at the 'Applications department'.
This is official notification of the intent to notify our intentions. At this juncture our intent is unclear but we do intend to clarify this as soon as we receive clear instruction of clarification to notify from the department of notification clarification.
If you have any questions then please speak very loudly as there is nobody [...]
This is an official notification of a temporary closure in WBC proceedings from monday 2nd february 2009.
This is due to the discovery by Mr Ernest Gripe of a seedy underbelly within these hallowed walls. Corruption, bribery and nepotism were words that came to light - so nothing unexpected at this juncture.
Of course as soon as [...]
It is my duty to inform all members of the World Blog Council that we will be undergoing a strenuous evaluation period over the coming weeks so all sensitive paperwork should be shredded immediately.
The mediator sent from Whitehall will be none other than the Honorable Ernest Gripe, a teetering force within the blogging community who [...]
It has come to my attention that there is underhand nonsense in progress on the internet based world wide web. A certain young lady, currently undergoing a lifetime ban from the WBC (for crimes against the Blogiverse) has been utilising her information technology skills to confuse and further derange staff members.
She has nominated the WBC [...]
It brings a tear to my eye and a lump to my throat to announce that during a very solemn and important ceremony this afternoon Mr T. Ern will be handed the keys to the downstairs broom cupboard. The implications of this are awe inspiring and somewhat humbling.
Mr Ern was born in a skip in [...]
With great pleasure I would like to draw your attention to the ‘WBC chatter box’ at the top right hand corner of this page. This method of communication may be known to you as a ’shoutbox’, ‘twitterbox’ or simply a ‘wall’.
If you click on ‘Leave a reply’ and type a message you may join in [...]
An increasing level of criminal intent has been creeping into the hallways of this hallowed edifice. Last Thursday two of my chocolate Hobnobs (a delicious and nutritious oaty snack to accompany my afternoon Earl Grey moment) were pilfered from Ms Tutts ‘kitchenette’. The perpitrator was of course instantly apprehended and handed over to the authorities [...]
An unsurprising lack of maintenance following a burst water pipe in the reception area, coupled with the somewhat strange disappearance of the front door has led to the creation of a temporary ice sheet. Skates will be issued to all staff members for reaching all ground floor offices.
The ‘no children’ sign posted at the entrance [...]
Due to prolonged exposure to the festive spirit an alarming number of WBC employees have yet to return to their departments this year. Of course this could be wild coincidence and everybody just happens to be on ‘errands’ and temporarily absent from every single office simultaneously whenever I check them.
However, this shall not cast a [...]
All WBC employees should be reminded to RSVP for the annual Christmas party as schnell as possible. After last year’s incident mit the giraffe costume und the missing waiter we have been asked to find a new venue. Luckily, the Colonel was able to pull a string so this year the festive celebrations will be [...]
I am pleased to announce that this months ‘Employee of the Month’ is young Tarquin from graphics for his sterling attitude toward his 7 day incarceration in the vending machine following an incident during a fire drill a few weeks ago.
Doctors have assured us that the excess weight he gained during that time will soon [...]
Due to last weeks abysmal fire drill in which 3 members of staff were admitted to the emergency room with second degree burns and Tarquin from graphics completely vanished we will be attempting a rescheduling at some point this morning.
Please try to remember that a fire drill does not require real flames or the need [...]
Would all employees please convene in the canteen this afternoon at 3pm to rifle through my deerstalker and choose who they will be Santa for this year. Please note that Ms Tutt will be inspecting all gifts this year so please try to avoid shops at the north end of the High Street - we [...]
Due to the recent spate of bad weather and the mysterious disappearance of all copper piping in the basement the building is somewhat chilly today. Ms Tutt is busy knitting thermal underpants in the foyer and Frau von Sauertraut is roasting chestnuts and some kind of sausage in the carpark. Mr Ern will be serving [...]
Due to a minor accident involving a paperclip, a cup of Earl Grey tea and a very delicate part of a senior staff member’s anatomy (that would normally be kept slightly below room temperature) all departments will be closed until tomorrow morning. As this notice was posted just after the close of office hours please [...]
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: Very interesting blog of this days!
: I found some. I should probably keep it under wraps though...
: Just came by for smut. Left disappointed.
: Did someone mention croquet?
: Lord Likely, you must take up this smut (verboten) mit the Colonel, if you can find him. I have been at him all day.
: I demand more smut.
: Mein secret stash of linzer cookies ist missing. This upsets me.
: Somebody always has to lower the tone. Tragic.
